Scott's Weekly Column

When Grandma goes to court

 When selling your property you will need to engage a solicitor or conveyancer you can trust to prepare a contract for sale and attend to the legal issues when a buyer is found. Often people will choose their solicitor or conveyancer based on a reference from a friend or colleague. Occasionally they may not be the person you thought they were!

“In a trial in a small town in the USA the prosecutor called his first witness, a local grandmother, to the stand. He approached her and asked “Mrs. Jones, do you know me? “ She replied “Why yes I do know you Mr. Williams. I`ve known you since you were a boy and frankly you`ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie you cheat on your wife and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you`re a big shot when you haven`t the brains to realize you`ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes I do know you.”

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked “Mrs. Jones do you know the defense attorney?”

She replied “Why yes I do. I`ve also known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster.  He`s bigoted and he has a drinking problem. He can`t build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women and one of them was your wife. Yes I know him.”

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and in a very quiet voice said,

“If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I`ll send you both to the electric chair!”

P.S Fortunately we live on the Coffs Coast and not the USA and all the local legal experts I know are great people!!

Have a great weekend!